ANTICA TIMES - NEWS

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(among other languages) in our printed editions.

[GUILDS]

Imperial Response Troop Returns

31 - July, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

KAZORDOON. Dissatisfied with the rampant lawlessness in the dwarven capital, a group of Emperor Kruzak's most loyal subjects rallies to re-establish the Imperial Response Troop (IRT), an organisation dedicated to «keeping Kazordoon a free and organised city».
    The IRT is to be formed not as a guild, but as an organisation open to members of already existing guilds and guildless folks alike.
    As of now the IRT is still looking for worthy candidates to be invested with various dignified offices at the imperial court, as well as mercenaries to enforce law and order in and around the Big Old One.
    -- There is a role in the IRT for any degree of activity, Xar Supreme says, Secretary-General and spokesdwarf of the IRT.

[GUILDS]

Mercenarys Live On

26 - July, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

FIBULA. After causing a sensation by announcing the Mercenarys' disbandment, Tor'Roshak Duxganx made a second statement, explaining that the issues with the Knighthood have been resolved through an agreement, and asserting that his previous words were misunderstood.
    -- What I really meant it was that I was going to leave it with no activity members at all, because of many reasons, mainly because I thought nobody cared, Duxganx explains.
    He continues by expressing his gratitude to the community for its care and support for the Mercenarys, and apologising for the confusion caused by his original announcement.
    The conflict's resolution was even commended by Flattery, one of the Mercenarys' most prominent members.
    -- Glad to hear Mercs are still around and kicking. Well done Dux, Flattery says.

[EXPANSION]

Princess of Thais Reveals Royal Plans

24 - July, 2020. By: Some Journalist

THAIS. The Royal House intends to expand the Thaian land unto the Plains of Havoc, Her Highness the Princess of Thais asserts.
    -- As the dwarves are standing still on their ground, we decided to go East rather than North, Her Highness says.
    The purpose of the expansion is to broaden the city's surroundings, apply Thaian law to the Plains of Havoc, and to educate and civilise its inhabitants. 
    The Princess of Thais, as a patron of the Owners of Thais, keeps the details secret, but confirms that the guild is organizing the project.

[WEDDING]

Priests Joined in Unholy Matrimony

21 - July, 2020. By: Some Journalist

THAIS. A Priest of Zathroth joined a Priestess of Zathroth in unholy matrimony this week at the Church of Thais. The ceremony was given by Lynda, and the church halls were decorated with lines of skulls on each row, and instead of the Tible, the True Book of Death was placed at the altar.
    Only one guest attended the wedding (EDITOR'S NOTE: except for our own correspondent), namely, Lovelytoes, who brought a gift to the newly wedded couple, which, among other things, contained 100 sudden death runes, a truelove teddy, and a tulip.
    When confronted about their honeymoon plans, the Priest of Zathroth declined the idea of travel.
    -- I am too poor and cannot afford to travel, the Priest said.
    Luckily, they were given free access to Meluna by boat, and departed there together. 
    During the ceremony, Lynda seemed oblivious to the evil nature of the bride and groom.
    --  It is a match made in heaven (EDITOR'S NOTE: or hell), priestess Lynda says.

[RITUAL]

Ravaging Ritualist Haunts the Capital

15 - July, 2020. By: Some Journalist

THAIS. A previously unknown witch put up a fiery scene that really rocked the capital city last night. Amidst a circle of skulls outside the library of Thais, the ritualist known as Avoca cried for innocent blood as she staged a violent sacrifying ritual among the citizens.
    According to Avoca herself, who at the time was dressed up as a real witch, the ritual was a sacrifice to honour Durin, under the echoing phrase of »Chamek ath uthul arak!«
    When asked about how many people had actually signed up to be sacrificed to Durin, Avoca gave negative comments:
    -- None, haha, Avoca said.
    The ritual soon switched place from the library gates to the Crossroads, where further fires were lit and more skulls were seen, arranged in the shape of a star.
    -- BLOOD TO BLOOD, Avoca yelled, as our reporter hurried to the next event in need of media coverage.

[BOOKS]

Red Rose Throws Exegetic Book Party

12 - July, 2020. By: Some Journalist

FIBULA. A large gathering took place in the Fibula Clanhall this week, where discussions about religion took place. The event was hosted by the Red Rose, and saw exegetes give a reading through the Tible and the Genesis, and free food and drinks were provided for the guests.
    Mihiron recited from a prayer book written by a friend of his, and later on the guests were free to roam the clanhall to read the religious books which were on exhibition, as well as to write down their own revelations to be added to the Red Rose collection.
    Members from various esteemed guilds were present. Among these were representatives of the Red Rose, Loremasters, Green Dragon Inn, and the Nightmare Knights.

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[GUILDS]

Mercenarys Announce Disbandment

26 - June, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

FIBULA. The current Tor'Roshak of the Mercenarys, Duxganx «the Fire Devil», recently announced that he will disband the Mercenarys due to conflicts with other guilds.

    He complains about constant attacks from the Knighthood and alleges that the Mercenarys' allies refuse to help them.

    -- For several months we have been molested by people with no honor. We were blamed by our allies of being in trouble instead of getting help. The guild Knighthood has been killing us non stop for months now, Duxganx says.

    Duxganx's defeatist statement was met with heavy criticism from Antica's community, with many not wanting to see this historical guild erased and suggesting that Duxganx should abdicate from its leadership instead.

    Scorn and derision was poured on Duxganx, with various people calling him a «coward», «a fake leader», «egocentric», «weak and pathetic», and «a plain loser».

[CRIME]

Gang War in Thais

24 - June, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. Waves of violence rock the capital as local gangs fight for dominance in its streets. A recent skirmish between the «Owners of Thais» and «Dunder Patrullen» in the Harbour Street proved particularly bloody and left many bodies in its wake.

    Judging by the body count the Owners of Thais continue to live up to their name, getting the better of their rival gang.

    Among the killed members of the Dunder Patrullen were Ee Zine, Druuuuuuuid, Ragax Abin, Raha Life, Strumpaan, and Taya Taur, while the only body found belonging to an Owner of Thais was that of Sky islimit.

    The battle also involved some guildless people, such as Felac, Ponyrider From Hell, and Trallisen, whose bodies were found among the others.

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[GOSSIP]

Casino Accused of Scamming

14 - June, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. The depot has recently been showered with defamatory pamphlets which accuse the local casino host Zaufany of scamming other prominent gamblers for several million gold each.

    When Awesome Brokul, the author of the pamphlets, was asked how he knew of Zaufany's alleged scams, he explained:

    -- I saw it with my own eyes. Yes, he is the biggest scammer on Antica. Zaufany is a scammer, that's all you need to know.

    Zaufany denies the accusations and claims that this smear campaign's originator is Black Hadik, a competing casino host and one of the alleged scam victims mentioned in the pamphlet.

    -- Hadik put these letters. Awesome Brokul is Black Hadik, same person, Zaufany says.

    Black Hadik refused to comment on this matter.

    Julciak and Stedeman, two alleged victims named in the pamphlet, assert that they never played with nor were scammed by Zaufany.

    -- I don't know him bro. I never played with him, Julciak says.

[MANIA]

Doomsday Prophet Troubles Thais

08 - June, 2020. By: Some Journalist

THAIS. A dishevelled man going by the name of Mighty Boris recently attracted attention in the depot by yelling an ominous message. While citizens exclaiming trade offers and such are nothing unusual in the depot, this man wearing a long robe, long hair, and an even longer beard peddled a message of doom:

    -- Fire engulfs the land, only one can be left to stand, blind hate through faith, they'll understand, relentless until the end, warborn!

    When asked about the meaning of his message, Boris uttered only a single word:

    -- Warborn.

Sheriff Wyat of the Town Watch warns against approaching such perturbators and advises to report them to the guards.

[FOOTBALL]

Red Rose Giving Satori a Good Beating 

22 - May, 2020. By: Some Journalist

YALAHAR. The Red Rose Football Club beat Satori Football Club, in this year's grand Football Tournament, with a total score of 14-3.
    The match consisted of two halves of five minutes each, with each team having one goalkeeper and four players. Bruce Harper, team captain of the Red Rose, had an outstanding performance as best scorer, although the defense of Satori was solid.
    Towards the final minutes, Bruce Harper scored one of the last goals for the Red Rose, taking the ball and passing through the entire defense of Satori, without problem.
    Alix, the supposed team leader of the Satori Football Club, hints that the Satori loss could be explained from the fact that the Satori team did not have a true team leader after all:
    -- Like, everyone was a team leader. Also, there was no real tournament in the end, and I did not play, Alix says.

[CRIME]

Shootout at Paladin Guild

20 - May, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. The Paladin Guild became the scene of a shootout involving members of the guilds Specialized, Stricted, and We dont care, as well as people with no affiliation.
    Witnesses report that a woman and a man barricaded themselves behind the Paladin Guild's counter, where they took Elane, the guild leader, hostage and used her as human shield. The two assailants were later identified as Lilith Beast and Menzil.
    Vigilantes breached the attacker's defence and took both of them down. The battle resulted in four deaths: Arell Skullblasterr, Falcon Solider, Lilith Beast, Menzil, and Running Forest.
    The assailants' motives remain unknown, and further investigations are still ongoing.

[SOCIAL]

Antica Registers Record Population

9 - May, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. The spreading Goromavirus drives people in droves to the safe refuges of Tibia, leading to an all-time high population count on our world.

    Health experts express concern over this rush, fearing that the social distancing rules decreed by the government cannot be adhered to under these crowded conditions. Especially depots and popular hunting grounds were identified as potential hotbeds for the spread of the virus.

    According to the Thaian Census Office many of the arrivals sign up for premium citizenship to skip entry queues and to make their stay more comfortable, leading to record revenue for the royal treasury. The royal treasurer looked rather pleased in a recent interview.

[CRIME]

Robbery at Shops Turned Massacre

3 - May, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. A group of robbers waylaid customers of Xodet's Magic Shop, but the situation escalated into a full-scale skirmish as vigilantes and random passerbys got involved.

    The battle raged not only at the magic shop but also inside the neighbouring jewellery store, where the robbers sought refuge and made their last stand. There a group of careless onlookers who gleefully watched the spectacle of flying runes and explosions was caught in the crossfire.

    The murdered customers and bystanders were identified as: Alard Dario, Daiczman, Krotochwilka, Ninetta Licciardi, Rema Hoot, Royal Necromancer, and Santiago.

    The slain robbers were identified as: Falsyfikot, Essa Nevercere, Glooth Bandido, Stara Flondra, and Vixomania.

    Xodet and Hanna, the proprietors of the affected shops, survived unscathed, but their properties suffered severe material damage from the battle.

[SHORTAGE]

Gauze Bandages Are All the Rage

4 - April, 2020. By: Some Journalist

ANKRAHMUN. There is currently a shortage on gauze bandages all over Tibia, as adventurers and townsfolk alike hamster stacks upon stacks in fear of the ill effects of the rapid spread of the Goromavirus.

    Incidentally, the worldwide suppliers of the gauze bandages in Ankrahmun have noticed a decrease in mummies within the underground tombs, and fear that the undead tomb dwellers may soon be extinct.

    -- For Arkhothep's sake! This crazed demand must be stopped before we all run out of gauze bandages when we all get the runs, a local supplier says.

[EXECUTION]

Pirate Captain Executed

2 - April, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. The wanted pirate captain known by the name of Bloodbeard (level 186 elite knight) has been arrested by agents of the TBI and faced trial in Thais for multiple criminal charges.

    The royal court found him guilty of several felonies, including illicit association, smuggling, piracy, murder, and tax evasion. Bloodbeard was sentenced to death; the sentence was executed promptly and the convict was hanged at the Thaian harbour.

    Authorities searched through his docked ship and confiscated various goods, among them a chest filled with crystal coins and a substantial stockpile of uncustomed rum and red hair dye.

    -- I think the Bloodbeard I married will never return, says Farlex, Bloodbeard's mourning husband.

    Bloodbeard will forever be remembered as passionate sailor, master fencer, rum connoisseur, facial hair aficionado, and avid reader of the Antica Times.

May his soul rest in peace.

[DEMONS]

Demon Sighted on Goroma

25 - March, 2020. By: Some Journalist

GOROMA. Morgaroth allegedly spawned on Goroma Island on Monday. The news were first reported by Alix of the Satori, was claimed to see the demon in question.

    -- Probably due to the Goromavirus, says a local.

[CHARITY]

Multimillionaire Showers Thais with Crystal Coins

25 - March, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

THAIS. A wealthy, assumedly Zaoan man named Xing Xing Xong won the hearts of the Thaian populace by throwing heaps of crystal coins into the crowd at the depot. This generous display quickly attracted a throng of enthused locals who followed their benefactor's every step all across the city.

    Xong's tour lead his followers from the depot down the Harbour Street, along the Sorcerer's Avenue, through the western town gate, and to the Open-Air Theatre, where he teleported back into the depot, all while covering the cobbled pavement after him with a trail of clinking crystal coins.

    Nobles and commoners alike were not above picking up the coins from the dirt; the jostling crowd caused such a commotion that a few resorted to drawing weapons and runes; others were trampled to death as they crawled on the ground, desperately trying to snatch coins. A few lucky, random citizens were also gifted a full stack of crystal coins each, turning some penniless commoners into millionaires over night.

    -- He gave me 1kk; cool guy, says Maga Dasserra, one of Xong's beneficiaries.

    -- He was throwing 1cc at Thais floor, but he gave me 1kk straight (sic), says Blind Hitman, another lucky citizen.

    When asked about the reason for his gold giveaway, Xong said he is departing from the lands of Tibia. He distributed by his own account at that night around 26kk gold in total -- his entire savings.

[HOUSES]

Fibula Clanhall Open to Public

15 - March, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

FIBULA. The Red Rose's secondary guildhall has opened its doors to the public. The Adventurer's Safehouse, as it has been dubbed, features all amenities a visitor could desire: Access to a depot chest, a Royal Tibia Mailbox (Gold Edition), a shiny reward shrine, an imbuing shrine, a hireling offering all available services, and even free lodging if one is lucky enough to find an unoccupied bed. Free access to exercise dummies may be made available soon, too.

    Regardless if intrepid adventurer or destitute hobo, the Adventurer's Safehouse welcomes guests of all stripes.

[HEALTH]

"Goromavirus" Threatens Liberty Bay

15 - March, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

LIBERTY BAY. A strange, previously unknown disease has emerged in Liberty Bay and rapidly spreads among its residents. While all reported infections are currently limited to the slum district of the town, the virus appears to be highly contagious and locals fear that it might soon engulf their entire town. Symptoms resemble the ones of the Venorean swamp fever, including fatigue, severe coughing, and respiratory pain.

    The origin of the virus remains unknown; expert druids speculate that it might have jumped from Vandura's wildlife onto pigs or rats which cohabit with humans in the slums. Others point to Goroma as its source, since the first cases of infections came from fishermen recently returned from the island, hence the name "Goromavirus".

Some superstitious slum dwellers claim that the disease is actually a curse that has been cast on Liberty Bay by Goroman cultists.

    -- Such theories are just fake news, says Charlotta, a healer residing in the afflicted district. She blames the rapid spread of the virus on the crowded, unsanitary conditions and overall squalor of the slums.

    -- The situation is under full control as we have quarantined the slums; there is no need to spread unnecessary panic, says Governor Silverhand.

    A task force of druids and alchemists has been assembled and works tirelessly on the development of a vaccine to cure the virus. Authorities strongly recommend to avoid Liberty Bay and its surroundings until plague doctors have reached the island for further investigation.

[SPORTS]

The 2020  Rose Cup (Red Rose)

1 - February, 2020. By: Furious Editor

FIBULA. In the recent days the ancient order of the Red Rose arranged the 2020 Rose Cup in football, held in their namesake guildhall on Fibula. A selected number of guests were invited to behold the event, and the hosting referee for the occasion was one of their leaders: Cotelaria.

The competing teams were... Bubbles: Fita Lucid, Scarecrow Nightmare, Crimsons: Seb La, Fluteinho, RR Machines: Quev, Red Rose Sharpshooter, Titans: Fantasy Fatale, Bruce Harper. First up were Titans versus RR Machines. Both matches were a painful sight to see. Titans completely annihilated the RR Machines, and the referee would not end the suffering; both matches were played full-time.

 

"I demand a drug test! Harpo [Bruce Harper] is on some super drug!" yelled a spectator. Before the second half of the second match could start, Bruce was checked for performance enhancing drugs, and was determined clean.

The game could continue with a crushing outcome. Another spectator commented: "They got Bruce'd, but they took it like champs." And so the results were:

Titans vs. RR Machines 1st Match: 15 - 0 (9 - 0)

2nd Match: 23 - 1 (10 - 0)

Total: 38 - 1 to Titans Next up were Bubbles vs. Crimsons.

 

Two intense matches where several fouls were handed out for invalid goals, but the referee was swift to pass fair judgement with his sharp eyes. Although this game was more stimulating than the previous one, a spectator still found it slightly lacking. "Crimsons would win if it were not for their goalman. That Scarecrow [Nightmare] isn't fast enough!" he said. However, the matches ended with a somwhat predictable outcome, and here are the results:

 

Bubbles vs. Crimsons 1st Match: 21 - 15 (11 - 5)

2nd Match: 30 - 18 (10 - 9)

Total: 51 - 33 to Bubbles

 

So the teams for the finale were settled: Titans vs. Bubbles. Counting scores, Bubbles were the expected victors of the cup, but the Titans held a strong passive-aggressive position and managed to hold a steady progress thoughout the final match which ended in their favour. The last and most exciting match of the event, ending the cup on a high note! The final score was as follows:

 

Titans vs. Bubbles Final match: 28 - 9 (15 - 2)

 

Congratulations to the Titans for their skillful and stylish gameplay! The players of the winning team got a mandatory goblet each, and two replica dolls of the variety Draken and Durin. The referee was also asked to elaborate on his "drug testing methods", to which he responded: "A heavy bag were given to each individual. This bug is so heavy that they wouldn't be able to carry any more item with them - not a single coin! Plus, they were all inspected before, during and after the games to see if they were indeed carrying the bag. Plus! I'm a druid, so I have my own techniques to know if the person used something or not. Almost like a feeling." With those words we would like to conclude our sports special, and thank the Red Rose for a successful event!

[HEALTH]

Cupcake Season: Druids Warn of Health Risks

1 - February, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

CORMAYA. With the conclusion of the annual cake event the market is being flooded by a surge of hundreds of cupcakes. These precious pastries, which are sold for well over 200k gold apiece, are especially popular among Tibia's high society, who not only enjoy them for their sweet taste, but also swear on the alleged curative properties of the fruity desserts. Druidic healers however express concern about this health fad and warn against an excessive consumption of cupcakes:

            -- Diabetes and obesity cannot be cured with Exura Sio, says Marvik, chief druid of Thais.

 

The Druid Guild instead recommends a diet of fruits and vegetables, which is not only cheaper but supposedly also healthier in the long term.

[MURDER]

Ambush at Inquisition HQ

27 - January, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

 

THAIS. Violent gangs continue to terrorise the city by ambushing citizens who enter the Inquisition HQ to receive their blessings. The latest victim of this series of murders was Vem Druid, who according to witnesses was killed by a volley of sudden death runes and fire elementals. Another visitor, Sixnine Tekashi, also came under fire from the assailants, but managed to fend them off. A group of vigilantes entered the crime scene shortly afterwards and confronted the bandits, with the ensuing battle spilling over to the streets.

    The suspects were later identified as: Altaria Spirunia, Ickq, Ilumniss, Juunky, Kuylis, Lucky Sork, Mag bullerbyn, Mom its me, Quattro Wave, Showizz, and Zjarany Antek.

    All suspects, except Altaria Spirunia, Lucky Sork, and Showizz, were killed during the battle. Authorities are still searching for the three survivors on the run.

[SCAMMING]

Beware the Steel Spider Silk Scam!

27 - January, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

 

THAIS. Crooks try to sell feigned spider silks at discount prices to random passersby in the depots with increasing frequency. Amar Jerada, a local resident, claims to have fallen victim to the so-called Steel Spider Silk Scam and to have lost 500k gold.

    -- There is a guy scamming people here all the time selling steel spider silk. He has three different names: Sir Moksha, Faling Vornethan, and Jokati, explains Jerada.

    Xit Oo, a resident of Venore, also reports to have been approached by Sir Moksha, who allegedly tried to sell him 100 steel spider silk for 12k gold apiece.

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[VANDALISM]

Visitor Trashes Green Dragon Inn

27 - January, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

 

THAIS. A guest of the Green Dragon was caught vandalising the inn, knocking over its furniture. Another patron of the inn, Mini Wziu, found the suspect alone in midst of the chaos and identified him as Amur beast.

    -- When I showed up he was in the guildhall alone and the guildhall was trashed. He was playing stupid when he saw me, Wziu says.

    Another witness, Karkov, confirmed to have seen Amur beast trashing the inn. The incident was reported to Mardin, proprietor of the Green Dragon Inn, who swiftly banned the culprit from his establishment.

    -- Meh, he won't be able to enter the inn ever again, so it's solved, was Mardin's only comment.

    Amur beast defends his innocence, claiming to just have been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

    -- I don't know, I came in, it was destroyed. After Mardin came I was sadly uninvited. I've done nothing wrong. Well, I can understand Mardin's decision, I respect him, explains Amur beast.

[RAT PLAGUE]
Rat Plague Haunts the Capital

25 - January, 2020. By: Some Journalist

 

THAIS. A swarm of rats came pestering through the Thaian streets by Tuesday evening, the 21st of January.

    No casualties were seen after the invasion, meaning that every-one survived, or that the corpses were eaten by the rats.

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[REAL ESTATE]
Analysis: Darashia -- A Tax Oasis?

25 - January, 2020. By: An Anonymous Journalist

 

DARASHIA. Despite a harsh climate and a strict ban on alcohol the desert kingdom records a steeply growing demand on the real estate market. The last vacant flat, Darashia 1 - Flat 01, was sold this week by auction for over 6,3kk gold. Market experts speculate about the causes of this rising demand.

    -- Property values in Darashia are still more expensive than those in Venore and Carlin, so yes, values in Darashia are expensive. But they are not more expensive than in Edron, Eleonore Silverhand explains, and continues further:

    -- Knowing that well-developed cities have a market value less than a city without resources, what would make it desirable for extremely wealthy people?

    Silverhand notes that the demand for property increased after the arrival of the piratess and former resident of Yalahar, Fada Misterious. Though it is unclear whether this correlation is also causal, Silverhand suspects that Darashian real estate is used by international entrepreneurs for tax evasion and by pirates and other criminal elements to launder money.

    -- I have seen up close the perhaps illicit enrichment of people living in Darashia. It seems that these people crave local domination.

    The sold flat, Darashia 1 - Flat 01, was bought by True Target, who has declined to give an interview.